When I decided to be his Mistress, to take him as my own, I didn’t do it from a position of love. I did not frame the basis of my control over him as love because I did not love him. I loved the idea of controlling him, of having him meet and exceed my demands but knew that he would do it out of his desire to have a dominant woman in his life, not out of desire for that woman.
I had expectations, which in the beginning I did not vocalise well or present in the best way but they were still there. He knew they were there but very quickly was having difficulty with idea of submitting to a woman that he is in love with, and loving the woman he is submissive to.
Now when I dominate him, when I make decisions for and about him I do it in the framework of love. I love him, I want him to be the best he can be, I want him to know the sense of fulfilment that comes with submitting to me.
He has lived longer than I have. I cannot use fuller or more complete when I compare his life to mine because I don’t believe either of them. He did more things, went more places, had a more active social life but none of them made him whole. I have done things he hasn’t done.
He desires the experiences I have had, continue to have. By submitting to my dominance, accepting his role in my life he is leaving his old life behind and getting to experience what he desires, what he has always desired. He is getting to have it all. Love & kink, at the same time, with the same person, in the same space.