Day 7 – Do you inflict discipline or punishment as part of your Dominance? Why or why not? How do you feel about discipline and punishment as tools used to invoke and maintain submission from your partner/s?
As I said yesterday, there is no routine domestic discipline in our relationship. I don’t think it invokes submission and it certainly doesn’t maintain it. I would be better off sticking my finger in his mouth to encourage submission. Just as dominance is *in* me, submission is *in* him.
I do punish him if he misbehaves – orgasm denial, withdrawal of privileges etc I don’t expect it to make him submissive, I just expect it to remind him of his place.
Day 6 – What do you feel are the roots of your Dominance? Do you think it has something to do with childhood, upbringing or parental example? Is it a relationship management tool as in the practice of domestic discipline? Is it a sexual thrill or something else?
I don’t think there are any roots of my dominance. It is the way that I am. I was raised by a strong woman but I think that only made me strong, not dominant. I believe it is not a nature vs nurture thing. I am the way that I am because I was made this way.
There is no domestic discipline in our relationship. I have spanked or paddled him on occasion after he disappointed me but I didn’t do it to teach him a lesson, more so to allow me to focus down to the root of the issue. It works for both of us.
Dominance does not manage our relationship, we do. Dominance is sexually thrilling but it is also personally satisfying.
Day 5 – Have you been or are you in a Dominant/submissive dynamic relationship or is this new to you? Have you been in more than one D/s relationship? How were they the same? How were they different? What is unique about your relationships in your mind?
We have been a couple for 6 months. This is my first D/s relationship. Before him I was married to a man who wanted a dominant woman but it didn’t occur to him to submit to the dominance.
My relationship is unique because we are both completely invested in both maintaining the relationship and the kink. I know there are many other relationships out there doing the same but mine is unique because its about him & his Miss.
Day 4 – Do you switch into a submissive role at any time? Are you a “switch” in BDSM terms? If not, have you ever thought about it or given thought to why it’s not for you? If you are in a Domestic Discipline relationship, are there things that you do not maintain control over?
I am dominant. It is in me. It is what I am. I am not playing a role. There is not one ounce of submissiveness in me. There is also no bottom in me. The closest I get to “bottom” is my position in the missionary position and I am still dominant when I am there 😉
It is simply not what I am. I gain no personal satisfaction from not being the one in control. I gain nothing from not making the decisions (although occasionally I tell him to decide the finer details).
I have no desire to be bound. No need to have impact toys used on me. There is nothing in it for me to be teased. I want what I want and I want it when I want it.
Day 2 – Describe what you are looking for in a submissive and the techniques you might use to instill those characteristics in your submissive. Are you exclusively Dominant in marriage or just in the bedroom? Are you Dominant only in the context of a scene or in a role or throughout your daily life? Are you Dominant to play partners or only in the context of a relationship?
I am not looking for a submissive. I already have one.
If I were looking I would be looking for an intelligent man who could hold a conversation with me and wasn’t afraid to share his opinion and ultimately follow my decision. I would expect obedience, courtesy and the willingness to be chaste.
I am dominant in everything we do. Sometimes I leave the decision making up to him but that only happens when I decide it should.
The force or degree of my dominance varies depending on the circumstances but I am always his Miss and he is always my boy.
We are in a committed, monogamous relationship. I have no desire or inclination to top or dominate another sub.
I stole this from Femi over on Deviantly Romantic.
Day 1 – Does your Dominance – either what you practice or what you strive for – have a label? Do you view your preferred Dominant style as Taken in Hand, Domestic Discipline, Top/bottom, Dominant/submissive, Master/slave, Owner/pet, or some other description or combination? If you do not use a label, why?
I am my boys girlfriend, his Domme, his owner and hopefully some day his wife.
From that list I am his Dominant. How I dominate him changes depending on the day, my mood and the circumstances.